Until Now

I have to look at this poster all day at work.

Up until today, I didn't give it a second thought. Now it makes me sad.

Vanilla Twilight

Right now I am sitting outside on the front porch being dined upon by ravenous mosquitoes as the moths flock to the light of my laptop screen. The neighbor kids are lighting fireworks down the street and the popping sounds echo off the mountains and interrupt my train of thought.

The other day I dropped my laptop and it landed on the power cord, right where it plugs in to the back. It broke off a crucial piece. Now I have to order a $20 piece of plastic that is the size of my pinky fingernail, and somehow manage to install it without breaking anything else.

Me + the Apple Store + my iPod = FAIL. Me + Google + my iPod = FIXED.

Jelli.net is awesome. Also, Last.fm, ftw.

I managed to get through the day only having told one person the fuck off and get a life. It’s okay, it was on the Internet. It’s still early, though.

This root beer float is delicious.

New playlist: Passion Pit, Modest Mouse, Owl City, The Shins.

There is a nest of five tiny baby birds inside the hanging flower basket outside my front door. They squeak and chirp so helplessly. I feel really sad for them for some reason.

I finished my clinical hours at the hospital. Tomorrow morning I find out when I can take my state boards. When I learn the date of those tests, I will know precisely when I can leave this damn place for good and escape to a city that knows my name…. the city where I want to be.

For now, I just sit and listen. To this:

Shady Wireless In The Projects

I am parked outside the Seattle Housing Autority Project near the waterfront. And, No, I will not be connecting to Darrell's Manhole.

Eight x Six

8 Things I like a whole lot:

Pie. I was going to say just pumpkin pie, but then I decided not to discriminate.
Sleeping In. Or perhaps just sleeping in general. I've had the chance to sleep in the last 3 days because I didn't have to work at all. I like it even better when the weather is crappy.
Traveling. I love getting on a plane and going to explore a new place. I especially like going alone... it's amazing. I also really enjoy going to places that aren't new... to see friends and family.
Rain. Yeah, I love the rain. I only like the snow for a little while, and then I'm sick of it.
Candles. Right now I am enjoying the relaxing fragrance of AVEDA's 'Shampure" candle.... it's the best smell in the universe.
Good song lyrics. Preferably written by Stephan Jenkins and/or Tony Friedianelli.
Laughing. I particularly love laughing until I can't breathe, especially at stupid things that only a few people understand.
The Beach. It's where I wish I was now, and where I won't be for a while. I love the sand between my toes, and the sun on my face. Cliche, I know.

8 Phrases I Say Often:

"She is trag." As in, 'tragic'. Most likely when referring to someone with unfortunate style, or poor hygiene.
"Suriously?" Pronounced like the name of TomKat's offspring.
"Yo." The usual way I answer the phone when my dad is calling.
"Is he/she kidding me?" A multi-purpose saying, most likely spoken when someone is wearing/doing/saying/acting/looking like anything I object to.
"I'm not going to answer that." Why answer the phone when you don't feel like it?
"What the fungool?" I like to swear in Italian.
"I don't have enough money." 'Nuff said.
"Are you on the phone?" I don't like interrupting people when they are on the phone... it's a pet peeve of mine, so I don't do it to other people if I can help it.

8 Things I want to do before I die:

Have a fairy-tale romance. Who doesn't want to live in a chick-flick... even for a moment?
Have a baby or two. My goal is to produce the first legitimate grandchildren in my family.
Go to Paris. Did you read the part about traveling?
Own the home of my dreams. Hellooooo, House Beautiful magazine!
Go skydiving. Always wanted to do this.
Make more money than I know what to do with. So I can build that dream home... and maybe I'll give some away.
Become the healthiest I can be. And look damn good while doing so.
Stay connected to my best of friends. Yeah, they are amazing.

8 Things I've learned from my past:

It's called a breakup because it's broken. Seriously... read the book if you don't believe me.
Even the most normal-seeming people can turn out to be crazies. It took me more than once to realize this.
Happiness is a journey, not a destination. So true, that I have this on my bedroom wall.
When the horse bucks you off, you have to get back in the saddle right away, or you'll never ride again. Literally, and figuratively.
Your roommates will never become your best friends. No matter how much you like each other at the time.
Once a cheater, always a cheater. You can take the boy out of the trash, but you can't take the trash out of the boy.
Worrying does not empty tomorrow of its troubles, it empties today of its strength.You just have to let it go.
Sometimes the best therapy is a pint of Ben and Jerry's and a good friend. I've used this one more than once, for sure.

8 Places I'd love to visit

Paris, France. The Eiffel Tower, The Louvre, Shopping, Cafes.... what could be better?
Oahu, Hawaii. I'll go when Leah is home :)
Seattle, Washington. Herrrro, seester!
London, England. Hellooooo European exploration!
Glenwood Springs, Colorado. Hot Springs in the Winter are the BEST!
San Diego, California. I need the ocean!
New York, New York. I want to live in a Gossip Girl fantasy.
Boston, Massachusetts. I will see a Red Sox game next season.

8 Things I Currently Need or Want:

To lose weight. I just want to be healthy again, and stop fluctuating so much. I see pictures of myself sometimes and wonder what I've become.

More money. I don't think I need to explain this one, do I?

My own place again. Living with your parents when you're 24 isn't all it's cracked up to be.

A car. I've been without for ten months now, and it sucks.

A better wardrobe. I really suck at buying clothes. I tend to get stuck in a rut and continually buy the same three things I don't need: sweats, underwear, and shoes.

A camera that can take decent pictures at live concerts. I love the camera I have right now-- I bought it for myself for my birthday last year-- but last weekend I realized that it has never taken a good shot at a concert. Maybe it's my fault, but I don't think so.. My very first digital was a 3.1 mega pixel Sony brick, and it took AWESOME pics at concerts.

To not live in Utah. Yeah, not my favorite place.

A best friend who works in the Airline industry. So I can have hookups on plane fare. I could do so many more fun things if I didn't have to worry about paying for airfare.

Third Eye Blind in Denver

Yesterday I happened to score some really great seats for the Third Eye Blind concert in Denver, for an awesome price I couldn’t pass up. Of course I would see them at almost any price, but these tickets were definitely a steal. I don’t have all of my pictures downloaded yet, so I’ll attach a couple and put the rest up later.

Think I’m just going to post the review of the show that I wrote for the band’s website, so if it’s worded a little funny, or you don’t know who these people are, that’s why. Stephan is the lead singer, Brad is drums, Tony is guitar, and Abe is the brand-new bassist who was brought in a couple weeks ago. Here’s the review:

Best show I've ever been to, hands down! The song choices were perfect, and the set was great! I was able to score some close orchestra tickets, and the theater staff let me stand at the stage for the whole show. I was all the way stage left, and had a great view of Brad and Abe. Abe sounded great on bass, and I really like him in the band. I really liked how they had the “Ursa” couch, and how they pulled it up to do a set of songs—it made it seem like the show was a little more

intimate. At one point during “Don’t Believe a Word”, Stephan made eye contact, so I motioned him over from where he was standing at the microphone, and he walked directly over to me and stepped up on a speaker to grab my hand, and of course I loved it. The encore was the BEST, and the acapella rendition of Bonfire at the end with the crowd clapping was amazing. I like that song a lot, and I think it works really well with the crowd. Of course they did their show staple, “Slow Motion” and also “God of Wine” in the encore as well, which were both great songs.

About halfway through the show, the members of the opening band, Low Vs. Diamond came out and stood with the crowd for a while. During “Jumper” I turned to them and told them they did a great job. They seemed to really be enjoying themselves, and a couple of them even sang along a bit.

After the show, I waited for the guys, and was able to chat with two of the permanent stage managers that tour with them. (I’m not sure if the title is “stage manager” or not, but that’s kind of what they were doing, so that’s what I’m calling them) The stage manager was cool and answered a couple of questions about the tour, and the band, which was really nice of him. I thanked him for talking to us, and he said something like, "No problem, you guys are cool, unlike that lady over there..." and he pointed to an obnoxiously drunk girl who had been throwing herself around and bothering the guys all night.

I talked to a couple of Abe's friend's, and then Abe came out and signed a couple autographs. I asked him if he was planning on joining the band, and he told me he would like to if it works out. He also said, "Tonight was the first night they let me do some vocals. Did you hear me singing?" Oh, and he said he wants to grow his beard out really long, like a pirate. (His words, not mine.)

Brad came out next and took a picture with us. He was smiling, and seemed pretty happy. He said he would go get a pen and he would sign some autographs. I asked him if Shelby signs autographs too, and he said “That would be funny. I’ll have to get her a stamp or something.” After he went and got Shelby he came back and signed my Red Star shirt and ticket stub, so that was awesome. There was an after party in the theater that the guys were going to, but they said they'd be back out. When he came back, he hung out and talked with fans for quite a while and answered a bunch of questions. He told me what his current favorite song to play live is, and answered more silly questions like that. He is super down-to-earth and just stood there and chatted away with us. Shelby was with him, and she had her own all-access pass on her collar, which was adorable. Brad took some more pictures with us, and signed some more autographs. (SIDENOTE: Brad has been my favorite band member from the moment I met him at Red Rocks in 2002 when he came out and talked with the fans. I love that he does this.)

When Tony came out, he was still wearing his sunglasses, and he shook some hands and went straight to the bus and then back into the theater. When he came out a while later, he signed autographs, and when a fan asked for a guitar pick, Tony walked over to the stuff that was being loaded into the truck, and got a pick for the fan, and signed it. He signed my Red Star shirt and ticket stub and took some pictures with us. He escaped to the bus fairly quickly, and didn’t hang out as long as the other guys did. Still cool, though.

After all the other guys came and went, and came back and got on the bus, we were still waiting for Stephan to make an appearance. Most of the people waiting outside had left by then, and just as we were contemplating giving up, Stephan came out. He was super cool, and as usual, his assistant told everyone to line up, and he would go down the line to take pictures and sign for us. He did, and just as we were set to take a picture, the camera died. The assistant said, “Battery dead” and handed it back to us as Stephan said, “Story of my life.” I asked Stephan, “Will you sign my limited edition Red Star shirt?” He said, “Of course I will.” I told him I was rocking out in the front row, and he said, “I know! I couldn’t forget that shirt.” That part made me happy. My brother said to Stephan that it was his first 3EB show, and Stephan asked him what he thought. After Stephan moved on to another group of fans, I asked someone if they could take a picture on their iPhone and send it to me. I asked the assistant and she said it was okay if we got in the end of the line. We got another attempt at a picture, but the assistant took a really crappy, blurry one and then said, “That’s it.” I told Stephan I really liked the new stuff, and he smiled really big and said, “Thank you so very much. Goodnight.” That was also freaking awesome. Then he got on the bus, and it was over.

All in all, it was an AMAZING experience. I wouldn’t trade it for anything. I am suffering from rock show withdrawals, though. I am sitting here listening to every 3EB song I have in iTunes and I keep just wanting to skip to the next one because it doesn't sound quite right. They were meant to be played live. Also, I just found out that some friends of mine were able to get passes to the afterparty, and all they did was ask. That’s a bummer.

Yesses And Nos

I know I haven't posted in a long time, so thats exactly what I'm doing.  I don't feel like posting anything real, though, so here's one of those dumb survey things from FaceBook.

1. You can ONLY answer Yes or No.

2. You are NOT ALLOWED to explain ANYTHING unless someone messages or comments you and asks. -- and believe me, the temptation to explain some of these will be overwhelming nothing is exactly as it seems.

Now, here's what you're supposed to do. . . Copy and paste this into your notes, delete my answers, type in your answers and tag as many of your friends as you'd like to.

Kissed any one of your Facebook friends? Yes

Been arrested? No

Kissed someone you didn't like? Yes

Slept in until 5 PM? Yes

Fallen asleep at work/school? Yes

Held a snake? Yes

Ran a red light? Yes

Been suspended from school? No

Experienced love at first sight? No

Totaled your car in an accident? Yes

Been fired from a job? Yes

Fired somebody? No

Sang karaoke? Yes

Pointed a gun at someone? No

Done something you told yourself you wouldn't? Yes

Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose? Yes

Caught a snowflake on your tongue? Yes

Kissed in the rain? Yes

Had a close brush with death (your own)? No

Seen someone die? Yes

Played spin-the-bottle? Yes

Sang in the shower? Yes

Smoked a cigar? Yes

Sat on a rooftop? Yes

Taken pictures of yourself? Yes

Smuggled something into another country? No

Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes? No

Broken a bone? Yes

Skipped school? Yes

Eaten a bug? Yes

Sleepwalked? Yes

Walked a moonlit beach? Yes

Rode a motorcycle? Yes

Dumped someone? Yes

Forgotten your anniversary? No

Lied to avoid a ticket? No

Ridden on a helicopter? No

Shaved your head? No

Blacked out from drinking? No

Played a prank on someone? Yes

Hit a home run? No

Felt like killing someone? Yes

Cross-dressed? No

Been falling-down drunk? Yes

Made your girlfriend/boyfriend cry? Yes

Eaten snake? No

Marched/Protested? Yes

Had Mexican jumping beans for pets? No

Puked on amusement ride? No

Seriously & intentionally boycotted something? Yes

Been in a band? No

Knitted? Yes

Been on TV? Yes

Shot a gun? Yes

Skinny-dipped? Yes

Gave someone stitches? No

Eaten a whole habenero pepper? No

Ridden a surfboard? No

Drank straight from a liquor bottle? Yes

Had surgery? Yes

Streaked? Yes

Taken by ambulance to hospital? No

Passed out when not drinking? Yes

Peed on a bush? Yes

Donated Blood? Yes

Grabbed electric fence? Yes

Eaten alligator meat? No

Eaten cheesecake? Yes

Eaten your kids/siblings Halloween candy? Yes

Killed an animal when not hunting? Yes

Peed your pants in public? Yes

Snuck into a movie without paying? Yes

Written graffiti? No

Still love someone you shouldn't? Yes

Think about the future? Yes

Been in handcuffs? Yes

Believe in love? Yes

Sleep on a certain side of the bed? Yes

It All Evens Out

"I have a feeling it all evens out, you know. At the very end of your life you're going to sit down at the table and you're gonna shuffle out the good and the bad, and it's all gonna make perfect sense to you when you figure out that in the accounting books it all comes out completely even. But then you're gonna ask, 'What was it all for?' and they're gonna say, 'Well, you did it, didn't you?'"

-John Mayer

It's That Time Again...

It’s that time again… moving time.  Tine to un-decorate.  Time to pack.  Time to thin out all of my junk.  There’s nothing like a move to help you get rid of things.

 

I started the process two weeks ago, packing small boxes of things, and sending them on their way.  Now it’s down to the wire, and I have to get all the rest of this junk packed and ready to go for tomorrow.  You’d think I have it pretty much done by now… but I don’t.  Not even close.  It doesn’t help that I could win trophies for my procrastinating skills, if there were such trophies.  (See, I’m doing it again, by going off on a tangent about procrastinating…typical.) 

 

Here’s my problem—I collect things.  Not really any certain thing in particular, just things.  So, I have a lot of things to sort through and thin out.  I guess in a way I’m kind of lucky that I move so much, or I would have waaay more things in my collection of things, due to never having to thin it out.  I sifted through my clothes, and got rid of about a third of what I had.  Sounds great, right?  No.  I still have too much stuff.  For example, I bought one of those vacuum-pack space-saving bags so I could put my down comforter in it and compress the hell out of it, and hopefully it would take up less space.  The particular bag came with a free smaller ‘travel’ bag in the package with it.  I decided to put my underwear in it.  Well, let’s just say that now my underwear now only take up one-fifth of the volume in my giant suitcase, instead of one-half.  The bag does its job marvelously, but my stuff is still too much.  You may be wondering why I can’t just get rid of more stuff, and the answer is quite simple, really… because I NEED eighteen pairs of pajama pants, damn it!  I NEED THEM!

I had some sort of analogy about an elephant in a petting zoo that I was going to use here, but I’m deliriously tired, and can’t remember it, so you’ll just have to make up your own, and hope it’s a funny as mine was going to be.