Open-Ended Questions

Hi, my name is:
Emily

Never in my life have I been:
arrested. I've been transported in the back of a police car, but I wasn't technically arrested.

The one person who can drive me nuts is:
the same person who gives me everything, makes me laugh the hardest, and teaches me the most.

“High school:
is like a spork: it's a crappy spoon and a crappy fork, so in the end it's just plain useless.” (John Mayer)

When I’m nervous:
I chew the cuticles on my thumbs. When I run out of thumb cuticle, I move on to my fingers. It's gross, really.

The last song I listened to was:
“Second Born” by Third Eye Blind

If I were to get married right now my best man/maid of honor:
would wear a dress that doesn't suck.

My hair is:
dirty.

When I was 5:
my favorite outfit was a pair of white overall shorts with a bright colored fruit pattern on them, an orange shirt, and pink socks.

Last Christmas:
I ate all the potato salad.

I should be:
in bed, but I'm sitting on the floor. Now my butt is numb.

When I look down I see:
a buffalo.

The happiest recent event was:
booking a plane ticket to get out of here for a week.

If I were a character on ‘Friends’ I’d be:
Ms. Chanandler Bong.

By this time next year:
I'll be a year older than I am now.

My current gripe is:
I'm only tired when I shouldn't be sleeping.

I have a hard time understanding:
why I have to call Jack Malone every time I talk to a semi-promising guy.

There’s this girl I know that:
will always feel a little bit guilty that she was such a whore her sophomore year in college, and now has to live with that mistake for the rest of her life while trying to convince herself that she made the right decision.

You know I like you when:
I make fun of you, or your dog, or your job, or your clothes, or your grammar.

If I won an award, the first person I would tell would be:
my seester.

Take my advice:
and DO NOT ever put your keys on top of the toilet tank.

The thing I want to buy:
tickets to a concert that hasn't been announced yet.

If you visited the place I was born:
you would be surprised to know that people in that city actually shave their legs, eat junk food, and wear shoes other than Birkenstocks or Crocs (sometimes).

I plan to visit:
my seester soon.

If you spent the night at my house:
we could share a bed, but only if you promise not to stink up the room like the last houseguest did ;)

I’d stop my wedding if:
Chuck Bass stood up and objected right before "or forever hold your peace."

The world could do without:
Utah. Seriously, I wouldn't even miss it.

Most recent thing I’ve bought myself:
some crappy stuff I'm planning on taking back to Sephora.

Most recent thing someone else made me:
a drawing of a deformed ballerina-- "I didn't even trace it, that's how good of a drawer I am."

Out of my friends, My favorite blonde is:
Leah Jean was pretty awesome as a blonde, but she's a hotter brunette. I'm going to have to go with Holly.

My favorite red head is:
6'6"

My favorite black hair is:
the one that is not in my salad.

My middle name is:
three letters long and boring.

In the morning I:
either sleep, or wish I was asleep.

Once, at a bar:
I saw Efram Zimbalist III, and an Aryan.

Last night I was:
doing the same thing I'm doing tonight.

There’s this guy I know who:
functions as a commercial paint sprayer.

If I was an animal I’d be:
a buffalo.

A better name for me would be:
Associate Professor Madame Captain Emily Cooley, PhD, CPA, MD, NASTAT, CPhys, IIA, Esq

Tomorrow I am:
simultaneously judging and playing in a magnetic darts tournament.

Tonight I am:
eating Girl Scout cookies for dinner.

My birthday is:
depending on how you count it-
either 45 days, 1091 hours, 65510 minutes, or 3930651 seconds from now.